Preparing Your Child for Music Learning

            I am not an advocate of “helicopter parenting”.  (Okay, maybe I have slight helicopter-parenting tendencies myself!)  Kids need to learn to be independent, right?  Well, yes.  But they need to be taught how.  Just because you put a five, or even a ten-year-old, in front of an instrument in order to practice, doesn’t mean he or she is able to get the job done.  Students will first need to learn how to be disciplined and self-regulated.  You may need to hover around them and steer them in the right direction until they learn to fly solo.

To be motivated to work at anything, children need to feel supported by parents.  Here are some ways you can help your child develop the interest, grit and fortitude needed to succeed in music.  Bonus … these skills will foster your child's disposition to be able to succeed in any endeavour.

 - Be enthusiastic about lessons.  Children pick up on attitudes you may not realize you are communicating.

 - Set aside time to listen attentively to your child.  Your child will feel supported and know that you value what she is doing.

 - Model and advocate for a hard-work ethic. Children learn more by example than words.  As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “What you do speaks so loud that I cannot hear what you say.” 

 -  Encourage your child’s effort even if the results of her effort aren’t great … yet! Your child will likely repeat or double her efforts knowing you notice and appreciate them.

-  Allow your child to make age-appropriate decisions so he can see the relationship between choices and consequences.  Making decisions builds confidence and a willingness to take the risks needed for learning.  When you permit choice, you are showing faith in your child’s ability, making him feel independent.

-  Allow your child to make mistakes (without chastisement!) and learn from them.  The direct consequences are usually enough to provide the information and motivation children need to create solutions for their problems or to make better decisions.  Believe it or not, sheltering children from negative consequences stunts their growth.

So maybe helicopter parenting is okay ... but only if you're training your child to be the future pilot. Then you get to step back and enjoy the fruits of your labour.

"Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment." – Jim Rohn